Forget the lemons—anyone can make lemonade. Lemons arrive one or two at a time.
Lemmings arrive in droves.
When your spouse has Parkinson’s, problems tend to arrive en masse, like an unstoppable horde of lemmings. Dealing with life’s lemmings requires a bit more creativity than merely making a cool, relaxing drink. While you may never gain control of the migrating mob, you must somehow steer them in the right direction.
Lemmings are interesting little creatures who sometimes migrate collectively—herds of cute, furry rodents naïvely leaving home in search of better pastures. And just like the historical myths about wolves, the lore about them contains as much misinformation and downright cruelty as it does truth.
Wikipedia says:
Lemmings have become the subject of a widely popular misconception that they are driven to commit mass suicide when they migrate by jumping off cliffs. It is not a deliberate mass suicide, in which animals voluntarily choose to die, but rather a result of their migratory behavior. Driven by strong biological urges, some species of lemmings may migrate in large groups when population density becomes too great. They can swim and may choose to cross a body of water in search of a new habitat. In such cases, many drown if the body of water is an ocean or is so wide as to exceed their physical capabilities. Thus, the unexplained fluctuations in the population of Norwegian lemmings, and perhaps a small amount of semantic confusion (suicide not being limited to voluntary deliberation, but also the result of foolishness), helped give rise to the popular stereotype of the suicidal lemmings, particularly after this behaviour was staged in the Walt Disney documentary White Wilderness in 1958.
The misconception itself is much older, dating back to at least the late 19th century. In the August 1877 issue of Popular Science Monthly, apparently suicidal lemmings are presumed to be swimming the Atlantic Ocean in search of the submerged continent of Lemuria. [1]
Thus, some 19th-century scientists were quite imaginative as storytellers and got their fantasy stories published that way. If only it was so easy today!
But back to the lemmings. We know how mob mentality works in humans, and it seems to happen in other creatures.
Events in life sometimes occur the way that an unsafe crowd surge at a concert does. Events and incidents pile up and press you, requiring more time and attention than one person has available. I suspect that sometimes, the unfortunate lemmings in the front of the pack are inadvertently shoved into danger by the unstoppable crush of the crowd behind them, and the rest follow, unaware of their peril.
For the caregiver, living with Parkinson’s is like that. It’s difficult to watch someone you love experience a series of declines that you are helpless to avert. Incidents happen that must be handled, and everything takes twice as long as we think it should.
When it’s all-hands-on-deck, everything else gets kicked to one side.
Here at Casa del Jasperson, giving my husband the assistance he needs has become a lot more involved than it was a year ago. Rising above the landslide of suggestions and well-meaning advice from friends and acquaintances that has become a buzz of white noise, I frequently hear the mantra, “Take care of yourself too.”
Sure. Thank you for that observation. Self-care is easier said than done, but lightening my commitment load will help.
Two weeks ago, my husband fell, sustaining a minor injury. Two days later, he was fighting off an infection, and we spent last Saturday in Urgent Care from 8:00 am to 7:00 pm. Rather than put him in the hospital, we were given the chance to participate in the “Hospital at Home” program.
Hospital-at-home enables some patients who need acute-level care to receive care in their homes rather than in a hospital. This program reduces costs, improves outcomes, and is much easier on the patient. So, we were at home, but he was on intravenous antibiotics, and nurses came and went with comforting regularity.
Thus, I didn’t have time to write my posts in advance the way I usually do. Wednesday and Friday’s posts were great examples of what happens when I rush to get a post up on schedule. I corrected the problems as soon as they were pointed out, but I’d prefer to not have to do that.
No one is perfect, but I like to do my best work. I’ll admit that publishing a post discussing a picture but with no image of that art piece is a humorous blooper. We did get a laugh out of it.
But it’s not “best” work.
Greg is now on the mend and slowly regaining the ground that he lost. His strength is gradually returning, and he is suffering fewer moments of confusion.
In the meantime, Life in the Realm of Fantasy is trimming back to two posts a week instead of three.
On Mondays, we will discuss the craft of writing and how it fits into my life. Sometimes, we’ll talk about the books I’m reading, and sometimes we’ll interview friends about their books.
On Fridays, I will share the images I find on Wikimedia Commons and talk about what I like about that painting or photograph.
I try to write my posts on Saturdays and proof them on Sundays, so having only two to deal with will allow me time to proofread them and work on my other creative writing projects.
And so, my friends, I’ll see you next on Friday, when I feature an example of the mad, fantastic art of Hieronymus Bosch.
Credits and Attributions
[1] Wikipedia contributors, “Lemming,” Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Lemming&oldid=1221843458 (accessed May 3, 2024).
Life in the Realm of Fantasy 