Active prose #writing

Verbs are the engines that power our prose. They can push the action outward from their nouns or pull it back inward. Verbs show the action but have shades of mood and tone.

When I am writing poetry, I look for words that contrast vividly against each other. I choose action words that begin with hard consonants and emotion words that begin with softer sounds.

If I can do this for poetry, I should be able to do this for narrative prose. Unfortunately, my poetic brain goes on vacation when I am trying to write a first draft.

Writing the first draft is difficult enough, but when that draft is finished, the real work begins. At that point, I must turn a choppy mess of a manuscript into something worth reading. There will be good passages, but they are interspersed with bald statements of action and response.

This stage of the process involves working on several layers:

• prose
• plot
• character arc

So, besides ironing out plot holes, beefing up scene transitions, and fine-tuning character arcs, I must focus on the prose. I must use my words as creatively as possible to show the most with the least.

Verb choices and the use of contrast in descriptors are crucial at this stage.

Power verbs push the action outward from a character. Other verbs pull the action inward. The two forces, push and pull, create a sense of opposition and friction. Dynamism in word choices injects a passage with vitality, vigor, and energy.

When we employ verbs that push the action outward from a character, we make them appear authoritative, competent, energetic, and decisive.

Conversely, verbs that pull the action in toward the character make them appear receptive, attentive, private, and flexible.

Concise writing can be difficult for those of us who love words in all their glory. So, I must use action words to set the mood. To do that, I must use contrasts.

• dwell on / ignore
• embrace / reject
• consent / refuse
• agony / ecstasy

A part of my life was burned away. I was destroyed, but now I was reborn in ways I’d never foreseen.

My action words are burn, destroy, and birth. The above character’s entire arc is encapsulated in those three words. In the opening pages, his verbs are darker, his actions more inward, and his demeanor sometimes brooding.

At the end of his story, events and interactions have changed him despite his wish for a calm life. His journey through the darkness brings about a renaissance, a flowering of the spirit.

Many power words begin with hard consonants. The following is a short list of nouns and adjectives that start with the letter B. The images they convey when used to describe action project a feeling of power:

• Backlash
• Beating
• Beware
• Blinded (adjective)
• Blood
• Bloodbath
• Bloodcurdling (adjective)
• Bloody (adjective)
• Blunder

Some of the nouns are also verbs, such as beating or blunder.

When things get tricky, and the characters are working their way through a problem, verbs like stumble and blunder offer a sense of chaos and don’t require a lot of modifiers to show the atmosphere.

When you incorporate any of the above “B” words into your prose, you are posting a road sign for the reader, a notice that ahead lies danger.

If I want to create an atmosphere of anxiety, I would use words that push the action outward:

• Agony (noun)
• Apocalypse (noun)
• Armageddon (noun)
• Assault (verb)
• Backlash (noun)
• Pale (modifier)
• Panic (verb or noun)
• Target (verb)
• Teeter (verb)
• Terrorize (verb)

If I want to show the interior workings of a character without resorting to a dump of italicized whining, I could write their internal observations using words that draw us in:

• Delirious (modifier)
• Depraved (modifier)
• Desire (verb)
• Dirty (modifier)
• Divine (modifier)
• Ecstatic (modifier)

So why are verbs so crucial in shaping the tone and atmosphere of a narrative?

Think about this sentence: Selwyn walked away.

We have three words indicating someone has departed, but they don’t show his mood.

Selwyn is a person (noun). He performs an action (verb).

That action affects both Selwyn and his objective: leaving. Away is an adverb (modifier) denoting distance from a particular person, place, or thing. It modifies the verb, giving Selwyn a direction in which to go.

We can write it several different ways still using only three words, and each indicates that Selwyn has left the scene. Each time we substitute a synonym for the word walked, we change the atmosphere of that scene.

• Selwyn sauntered away. (He departed in a carefree, leisurely manner.)
• Selwyn strode away. (He walked decisively in a particular direction.)
• Selwyn stomped away. (Selwyn left the scene in a bad mood.)
• Selwyn ambled away. (He walked slowly.)
• Selwyn slogged away. (He departed but had to work at it.)
• Selwyn slipped away. (Selwyn departed in a stealthy manner.)

Many verbs cannot impact a character or object directly. These are called intransitive verbs. They are as crucial as transitive verbs because they show a mood or condition, a state of being, or a reflex (automatic response).

Consider the word “mope.” Mope is an intransitive verb that means discouraged and apathetic. It’s an action word that goes nowhere.

• Selwyn moped. (He was dejected and apathetic.) (Boring.)

We can have our character in a bad mood but with variations:

• Selwyn pouted. (He was whiney, and we don’t want to read anything more about him.)
• Selwyn languished. (He did nothing and stagnated, and we still don’t care.)
• Selwyn sulked. (He was angry and self-pitying, and we will close the book on him.)
• Selwyn fretted. (He was in a neurotic mood, and we tell our friends the book sucks.)

Some intransitive verbs in the family of “mope” are more robust and carry greater force:

• Brood (a dark, obsessive mood.)
• (Obsessively thinking about it, suffering.)

We can perk Selwyn up when we add a strong intransitive verb to a powerful transitive verb. Then, we have action and mood:

• Selwyn strode away, brooding. (He left the scene, and someone will suffer.)

So, verbs and nouns must have modifiers and connectors to show a scene in the most visual and evocative way possible.

The trick is to choose the descriptors and the verb forms that have the most impact. The selection of modifiers and connecting verbs can enhance contrasts or weaken a sentence.

Making revisions is a lot of work. But taking the time to examine the layers of plot, prose, and character arc is required to take your manuscript from first draft to finished novel.

I suggest keeping a thesaurus on hand. I also have a dictionary of synonyms and antonyms because I want my words to say what I envision. Having a list of word forms and their synonyms enables me to express my ideas with fewer modifiers.